Light vs. Darkness

The word "cave" or "caving" is not a term I use on a daily basis. In fact, when I think of a cave I generally think of Phantom of the Opera and Batman. I know, very random. When I found out I would be going caving and learning what caving therapy looks like, I was a little apprehensive. However, I believe I walked away from my caving experience understanding more of who God is and who I am in light of Him.

We headed out to Canon City, CO on a Saturday morning. The cave we would be going into was called Fly Cave. It was interesting to compare what I expected the cave to be and what it actually was. Tim (my supervisor and our guide) pulled off onto a dirt road in the middle of no where and this is what it looked like...

 Then, we put on our helmets and headlights and walked about a mile to the cave. As we arrived at the small opening to the cave, I began to be fearful. Not only did the cave have an opening that seemed impossible to fit through but it also had a lock on it. I quickly understood how this could be a perfect place to help someone overcome fears and anxiety!

As we ventured into the cave it was dark and eerie. Tim made us turn off our head lamps and sit in the dark. It was pitch black. Despite how long we sat in the dark, our eyes never adjusted. Why? Because there was absolutely no light coming through. However, when only one person turned on their headlamp, we were amazed to see how much light it gave off.

As we continued to maneuver through the cave, I was amazed at how comfortable I became. I even began to venture into smaller openings that were more challenging to get through. I felt like I was a body contortionist! More importantly, I was overcoming my fears of the unknown.

In Psalm 27:1-3 David says, "The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? When evildoers came upon me to devour my flesh, My adversaries and my enemies, they stumbled and fell. Though host encamp against me, My heart will not fear. Though war arise against me, In spite of this I shall be confident."

In the midst of darkness, it is easy to become fearful. Often times, it paralyzes you. What if I get stuck? What if this doesn't turn out the way I want to? What if I get hurt? Then, we come to the sobering reality that we don't have to remain in the dark. We aren't stuck. There is light in the distance if we would only move forward.

Going caving allowed me to see this analogy in such a tangible way. Yes, trials will come my way. Yes, it becomes easy to fear the unknown. But what can I do now that will cause me to overcome fear? I believe David sums it up in Psalm 27. The LORD is my light and salvation. Whom shall I fear?

I am happy to say that we made it back to the light safely and here are some pictures that our supervisor took to remember the incredible experience!

 Traveling to the cave!

 Coming out of the cave!

 Yay for light!

 Notice the dirt? We were filthy when we came out.

This was the awesome group of girls that went with me. We felt pretty accomplished afterward.:)

I am rescued...

"I waited patiently for the Lord; And He inclined to me and heard my cry. He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay, And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; Many will see and fear and will trust in the Lord."-Psalm 40:1-3

When I think of being rescued the first thing that comes to my mind is the recent rescue of the Chile miners. Two months of darkness. Utter hopelessness and despair. Can you imagine? Then, the whole world watched as each miner was rescued. One by one they up came to the light with special glasses on their eyes because they had been in the dark for so long. Everyone rejoiced as this miraculous rescue took place. What a beautiful picture of the gospel!

This past week, God reminded me of His beautiful rescue in my own life. In my "Gender and Identity" class we began to delve into the topic of self-image. As believers, we all buy into the lies of Satan and the world. Despite the fact that we have been made new, we continue to think less of ourselves or too highly of ourselves. When we have a poor self-image, it effects every area of our life. Soon, we believe the lie that we have no purpose and meaning.

As the Thomason's continued to lecture on self-image, I became extremely convicted. I had bought into the lies once again. Then, the Thomason's went on to teach what God says about self-image. They said, "a healthy self-image is seeing yourself as God sees you...no more, no less". C.S. Lewis once said that "Christian humility is not thinking less of yourself but rather thinking of yourself less". Where does our worth and value come from?

At the end of class, they put the words, "I AM _______" in the middle of the white board. Then, each classmate came up to the white board and wrote a phrase of what that meant to us specifically. The first thing that came to my mind was," I am rescued".  When I was helpless and had no hope, He hear my cry. He brought me out of the pit of destruction and placed my feet on a solid rock. Glory to God!

So, now I challenge you. Who are you and what are you living for? Who can fill your emptiness and hurts? Jesus says, "I AM the way, the truth and the life" (John 14:6). He gives us life and purpose. He deserves all of you!

 

The Climb

It's hard to believe I have been in Colorado for 2 weeks. At times, I feel like I just arrived. However, the friendships and community that has formed so quickly makes me feel like I have been here for months. As people have begun to ask how I like it so far I can honestly say, I love it. I can't imagine being anywhere else. The professors are phenomenal, the FLI staff are so loving and encouraging and Colorado is beautiful!!

 Before we arrived, all the students gave their top three choices for their internship. My first choice was with a lady who does marriage and parenting seminars and broadcasting. My second choice was counseling. I knew that God would place me where I needed to be. When I found out I was interning with the counseling department, I was nervous and skeptical that it wasn't the right placement. However, I quickly realized that it is exactly where God wanted me to be. I have already learned so much from interacting with different counselors on staff. They are so helpful and supportive!

This past Saturday, I decided it was time to embark on an "adventure". After arriving here, I quickly learned 2 things: everyone in Colorado loves the outdoors and they are all athletic (a little bit of a generalization but true). So, I put on my hiking gear (the little gear a FL girl has) and headed out to climb the Incline. Which is this:

The Incline is basically 1 mile up of stairs (3,000 to be exact). It is pretty much death and the hardest thing physically I have done in a long time. From the time we set out on the hike, I knew it was going to be challenging. Not only was I not in top notch shape but I also was still fighting against the high altitude. As I started out, I was pumped. Ya, it was going to be difficult but I was optimistic.

About 100 steps later I was wheezing, my legs felt like jello and I wanted to turn around. What in the world was I thinking? I'm not in shape. I can't do this. This is crazy! Unfortunately, turning around was quite potentially just as dangerous. Considering how steep it was...

So, I continued on remembering the wise words from a local who had done the Incline numerous times, "Just take one step at a time. Don't look back and keep focused on the next step as you remind yourself that the beautiful view will be worth it".

FINALLY, after a brutal hour and fifteen minutes I made it to the top! 

The thing I love best about a hard hike is the analogy of a Christ follower. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 9:24-27, "Do you know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win. Everyone who competes in the games exercises self-control in all things. They then do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. Therefore I run in such a way, as not without aim; I box in such a way, as not beating the air; but I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified."

At times, the climb seems unbearable. It would be easier to turn around and go back to the "former self"(at times I do). But by the grace of God, I keep climbing. Taking the next step and looking forward to the imperishable prize. Looking to Him, the author and perfecter of faith. He is there even in the pain and hardship. His lovingkindness is better than life.